In Guangzhou and ready to go home !

We still have two full days left in Guangzhou, but I can tell you that we are completely ready to go home. The trip has been nothing short of amazing and of course nothing less than exhausting ;-) Lei is doing extremely well, but is testing us daily and always stretching boundaries. He appears to be a typical 5 year old boy in every way. I would say the language barrier has been the most challenging aspect of this adoption because Lei is so verbal and it's obvious he is frustrated with us when we don't understand him. We are able to communicate with him for all his basic needs, but he loves to tell stories, ask questions, and describe things so this is where I'm sure he feels quite isolated and lonely. He is extremely smart and catches on to everything amazingly fast so we know the language barrier won't last long, but it's still really hard now. This past week has also been really difficult because we miss Audrey and Rachel so much. I can't believe we've been away from them for so long.

I'm really feeling that Lei having his two Mei Mei's will make all the difference in the world for him. Lei looks alot like Audrey but his personality has many of Rachel's traits so I just can't wait to see them all interacting together.

Lei is really good with other children and especially with younger ones. He must have been in charge of some of the little ones at his orphanage because he is very protective and interactive with some of the younger children we've met. I have a feeling Rachel will love having him for a big brother since she loves alot of attention ;-)

Lei has been much more affectionate the past couple days letting us hold him and hug him with even an occassional kiss so we are really happy about that. I really don't think there are going to be many issues with bonding or attachment except it will of course take longer since he is older. He was clearly attached to the orphanage director and other children at Jiaojiang SWI.

Also, I want to thank all of you who have posted comments. We have been able to read your comments in Hangzhou and Guangzhou and they have been so comforting.

I'll try to post a few pics soon.

and More

More Pics

Lei's adjustment continued ....

Well It's 5:45 am or so and we are all up for the day, not my choice for sure ;-)

I'm going to where I left off, after Lei came into the hotel and decided to stay awhile. We all turned into bed around 8:30 pm. On Tuesday, our guide Jessica picked us up at the hotel at approximately 9:00 am to take us to get Lei's final adoption certificate from the civil affairs office where they were preparing it and then back to Taizhou where we had to return (a 3.5 hour drive) to get Lei's passport. Our trip to the civil affairs bureau was uneventful and we received our adoption certificate and finalized the adoption in the eyes of the Chinese, took a few pictures and we were off ! Lei mostly talked to our guide Jessica the whole time and quickly befriended her again. Lei spoke to Jessica non-stop for nearly 2 hours on our trip to Taizhou and then passed out cold and slept almost the entire remainder of the trip. Alex and I just took everything in stride knowing how difficult returning to Taizhou again would be for Lei. When we arrived in Taizhou, we met director Liu and some of the orphanage staff for lunch at a really good restaurant Director Liu had treated us to before. The lunch was delicious, but the mood a bit sad and Lei's expression during our lunch kept me close to tears the entire time. As I sit here typing this it still saddens me to think about it. But, again, we did what needed to be done, smiled as much as possible to show our sincere appreciation and headed for the gov't office where Lei's passport would be issued. Director Liu conducted herself in the most loving and professional manner the entire time and I can't say enough about how much we respect her.

It took about an hour to get all the paperwork straight and while we waited, Lei mostly talked to our guide Jessica and Director Liu. We did have one instance where Lei and I really connected as he taught me a song he knew with the hand gestures that accompanied it. I actually posted a picture where he is with me smiling as we do the gestures together and he sings this song. When it was time to leave the gov't office, Lei again resumed the saddest, most confused expression, but he resigned himself to leave with us. Director Liu hugged us both and I fought back the tears as we did what needed to be done, yet again. On the way back to Hangzhou, Lei spoke mostly to Jessica our guide and told her stories again, such as "the Monkey king", "Cinderella" and "Snow White". When he told Cinderella he put his own spin on it because he has quite the imagination. He told Jessica that when the prince tried the slipper on Cinderella's foot that Cinderella's foot stunk ;-) After finishing the stories, though, Jessica informed us that Lei was telling her that he wanted to go back to the orphanage and that if he was forced to come back to Hangzhou, he would walk back to Taizhou. Jessica spent alot of time talking to Lei and reasoning with him. She finally was able to get him to agree to to come to the hotel again, under the premise that she would be back on Thursday to see him. Alex and I were at a loss and just prayed for God's wisdom in all of this. We never have had any doubt that Lei is our son and although his feelings have been difficult to bear at times, he is an amazing child just having normal reactions that any well treated, loved child would have when he has lost so much.

I don't have time to post more now, but I will tell you that Wednesday was a major turning point and we now have the sweetest, most high energy, most intelligent, loving son we could have ever hoped for. He has accepted us :-) He is speaking some english and very well I must say. He only knows a little english and he will occassionally just blurt out spontaneously, I love you mommy, daddy ! It doesn't get any better than that.

The Wild Ride !

The subject line pretty much says it all ! The past 2 days before today were very difficult for all of us, but most of all for Lei. I believe in our attempts to make his transition to us go more smoothly, we may have in fact prolonged his grief. We spent almost 2 full days in Taizhou with Lei and director Liu before coming to Hangzhou for the formal adoption. While we loved visiting with Director Liu and spending time together with her and Lei, I think Lei was confused about everything going on. Everytime we were with Director Liu and his nannies and then we had to leave, Lei was visibly shaken and upset. His most emotional separation occured when we arrived in Hangzhou and we had lunch with the director, driver and assitant director. After Lunch the Director and staff left for their own hotel and we decided to walk up the street to our hotel. Lei was so grief stricken when we left separately from the director that he screamed and cried and baba had to pick him up and carry him the whole way to the hotel (a short walk thankfully). It truly felt like an abduction, but we did what we had to do and it was heart wrenching.

Once we got Lei to the hotel he calmed down some. In the afternoon, we let Lei watch some Dora DVDs we had brought that were in Mandarin and taught English. Lei watched these for over two hours and didn't want to stop. They took his mind off his troubles temporarily but once we turned off the DVD player, another meltdown ensued. We all went to bed at 9pm exhausted to say the least.

Monday was adoption day and we were very nervous as to how Lei was going to react to seeing Director Liu again. To our suprise Lei handled everything amazingly well with the exception that he was extremely over-stimulated and ran around the conference table no less than 100 times ;-). After the adoption our guide Jessica took us to a local market where we purchased a few things we needed and a few we really didn't. We picked up some Mcdonalds to take back to the hotel and we were suprised to find out that Lei knew exactly what he wanted, a hamburger. He ate a whole hamburger and small fries in record time lol. After lunch I decided to be really brave and take Lei swimming at the hotel pool. The swimming was wonderful and so funny because Lei thought it was like a big bath tub and proceeded to strip. I promptly explained to him that he had to wear his shorts ;-)

When we finished swimming I had no idea what I was in for. We dried off but still had our wet swimsuits underneath our clothes. I was planning on going back to the room to change, Lei had other plans. The pool was on the first floor so Lei decided to make a straight line right to the lobby doors. He went out on the front steps outside the door and refused to come in. I can't remember the last time I felt so helpless or at a loss as to what to do, but I truly believe the lord had a hand in what happened next. After about 5 minutes of pleading with Lei to come in a young chinese woman came up with her baby boy in hand and said hello. She was smiling at Lei and showing him her son. Feeling completely desperate I asked the woman if she spoke english and she said "some". I then tried to explain to her my dilemma and asked if she would speak to Lei and persuade him to come in. She spoke to Lei for several minutes and informed me that Lei said his friend was supposed to pick him up at 8 oclock. I had no idea what he was talking about at the time, but later found out that our guide had told him this and the guide was the friend, except it was supposed to be 8 oclock in the morning ! Long story short, this woman convinced Lei to go to our hotel room. I promise that things get better with this story but it takes a day or so. Lei is sitting next to me right now watching "Ultraman" on his portable dvd player. He is stopping to explain the movie to me every 30 seconds so I'm going to have to finish this post later.

Taizhou Pictures & Adoption Pic in Hangzhou

First the pictures

Sorry we haven't posted in several days but more about that after the pictures ;-) Lei is just a little more of a "swashbuckler" than we first expected ! As I am trying to compose this blog submission, Paul Lei is on his third Kung-Fu Balloon Volleyball Tourney, and will not stop. A melt down on the event calendar? we do not know.... as usual time will tell.

Our first full day with Lei and the Orphanage visit

Yesterday was a day full of much happiness and some sadness. We began our day eating breakfast with our guide Bruce, then meeting Director Liu, her assistant, another nanny and our Lei. We then first visited the orphanage and took many photos. Visiting the orphanage was a very humbling experience but still brought us so much joy. We couldn't help but feel sadness for the beautiful children still waiting for their families and especially for those who will never know one. Despite residing in a facility that only provides the bare necessities, We have never experienced so much genuine love before, both from the children, nannies, and director Liu. There was no sugar coating of words during our visit, only the direct truth as we were told the expected fate of many of the children and shown the living quarters and bedroom of our new son. I can't really think much more about the orphanage visit right now, but I will post more later. I do want to mention that it was so very obvious to us that the children of the orphanage were and are very important to Lei. He just shined with happiness as he played with his friends for the last time. The children of Jiaojiang CWI are so much a family in every since of the word.

After the orphanage visit, we took a tour of Jiaojiang and surrounding areas in Director Liu's minivan and took alot of video and photos. We also had the privledge of visiting Lei's finding place, but only took pictures from the Van.

We saw the old orphanage which the children left in 2001 so Lei was never there except to visit it with Director Lei because her office is still there today.

We visited the site for the building of the new orphanage which Director Liu is so excited and enthusiastic about. She just beamed with joy as she showed us the new site and earlier showed us pictures of the plans for the new facility.

We ate lunch at a restaurant and we ate some of the best seafood I've ever had. Since we have visited Jiaojiang, I've overeaten at every meal. I guess that just says it all. Director Liu has made sure that we have never had the chance to become hungry ;-)

After lunch we were invited to visit Director Liu's home where we were given a tour of her house, watched some TV and ate Chinese plums (a local favorite), and drank some very delicious Tea. Lei has been living with Director Liu for awhile now and he was very comfortable in her home ;-)

Director Liu also provided us with another trip to a beautiful park where Lei often was taken to play and we watched him feed these amazing white pigeons. The pictures we took there are going to be amazing as well as the video.

We then went to dinner for another delicious meal where we also had the privledge of meeting Director Liu's boss, the bureau chief and his wife. After dinner, the hard part came .....

Director Liu took us back to our hotel and Bruce gave Lei a piggyback ride into the hotel. As soon as Bruce, Alex, I and Lei were in the building, she made a quick getaway and there we were, alone with our son and Bruce for the first time.

During the entire day, Lei was so happy and content because director Liu was with us. He was very friendly and sweet to us, but it was obvious that he is very attached to director Liu. When we were first left alone with Lei in our hotel room, he was ok and watched some TV, tried to converse with us in mandarin some, and was just checking everything out a little. When we tried to get him to change his clothes is when he started getting upset. The next thing you know he has went and grabbed Director Liu's business card and he is insisting that we call her. Bruce's hotel room is across from ours so I went and got him and he came and called Director Liu for Lei. She spoke to Lei and reminded him that he promised he would stay with us tonight and that was that. After the phone call, Lei told bruce he wanted to take a bath before he put on his pajamas. The bath was the final straw and then came the saddest meltdown I've ever seen. After Bruce was gone and I was trying to help Lei get his bath, he just started crying and crying and speaking to me in mandarin. He got in the bathtub and was trying to wash but just couldn't stop crying. He was trying to tell me something and I had no idea what it was so I just kept telling him "don't be afraid", "dont worry", and "it's ok" in mandarin, some of the few phrases I know. He was so upset, that I finally just helped him rinse off, picked him up and put a towel around him. He let me help him get dressed and then we just put him to bed and he was asleep in no time. He is a fantastic sleeper and slept last night from 9pm until 6am at which time we woke him up just in getting ready. This morning he is like a new kid and very happy and content. I'll post pictures when we get to Hangzhou because we leave at 8am this morning, very soon.

Lei is truly a dream come true and I just wish I had more time to post. He has the sweetest, kindest nature with just a little "swashbuckler" in him. He is perfect for our family in every way.

Final note: I brought a book called "Chinese for adoptive families" made by an adoptive mom and this book has become my security blanket. I cannot thank amy kendall enough. It has kept us from feeling helpless in communicating with Lei. We have also learned pinyin pronunciations which is invaluable.

We have met Lei Lei !

At approximately 3pm at the Jiaojiang Bus station we were greeted by Director Liu and our new son Lei as we stepped off the nearly 6 hour bus ride. First, Our son Lei is absolutely, undeniably adorable in every way. He also appears smaller to us than we expected, but it may just be us because we really don't have any frame of reference right now. We are just hoping that all the clothes we brought aren't too big. Ok, back to our first meeting at the bus stop ..... When I stepped off the bus, I first saw director Liu and hugged her, then I looked down and saw Lei being urged towards me with a very large bouquet of cream lillies and coral roses. Alex and I looked down at Lei and saw the sweetest face you could ever imagine. In a split second, he looked up at both of us and said as plainly as I've ever heard it, " I love you, Mommy, Daddy " . To say that we are both in love with our Lei would obviously have to be an understatement.

Now, onto reality .... We were almost immediately whisked into Director Liu's mini-van with our guide Bruce, two of Lei's nannies, and Lei right after we arrived. Lei was sat on the edge of my chair and sat there for a couple seconds, then jumped his little hind end over to daddy's chair ;-),too cute ! Did I mention he already has daddy wrapped very tightly around his little finger.

Once we arrived at our hotel, "The Phoenix Villa", we went up to our room with Director Liu, the assistant director, Lei and our guide Bruce. We all ended up sitting in our guide Bruces hotel room visiting for over an hour. It took a little while but we eventually we were able to see a lot of Lei's personality coming through. I am here to tell you that he is quite the character and very outgoing. He also has no problem expressing himself fluently in Mandarin. Director Liu had said Lei is shy, but this must just be around new people or strangers because we certainly did not see it. He is quite full of himself and appears to be extremely smart.

While we were in the hotel room, Director Liu and Lei showed us some of his school work he has been doing and he can already write all his uppercase english letters amazingly well. He also writes many chinese characters and he has written the names of many of his friends from the orphanage. Director Liu gave us a photo album with many great new pictures of her and Lei with the other children from the orphanage at at the local town square playground and park recently. While we were in the hotel room, Director Liu mentioned to Lei that he could stay with us in our room last night but this didn't go over well at all. Poor Lei was visibly upset and big crocodile tears rolled down his cheeks. Since we are going to be in Jiaojiang two nights, we told director Liu that if it was ok with her, Lei could stay with her instead until he got used to us. I think tonight Lei is supposed to stay with us, but we are hoping that since we are spending the day with him, it may not be quite as traumatic for him.

Last night after we left the hotel room, we went to a banquet room in the hotel where we ate a large array of delicious sea food selections ordered by director Liu. We had a wonderful meal with Director Liu, the assistant director, another nanny, our son Lei, and our guide Bruce. Director Liu is such an amazing lady and we feel so blessed to be spending this time together with her and Lei. After the meal, we all rode down to the local square and walked around and saw all the people and the lights, water and large number of Taizhou natives dancing to some pretty entertaining disco music ;-) We also saw many children rollerblading which seemed to spark Lei's interest. While we walked around the square/park, Lei held both our hands whenever we requested it which was most of the walk :-) Lei seems to really enjoy lifting both of his feet up in the air and having us swing him quite frequently which was alot of fun for all of us !

After our visit to the park, we returned to our hotel room where Director Liu tried to coerce Lei into staying at the hotel with either us or our guide Bruce, but it was a "no go" because Lei was tired and not wanting to be left with strangers which we completely understood. Director Liu and Lei left for her house at approximately 8:15 pm. Alex and I promptly passed out and we are now getting ready this morning to visit the orphanage. We will post a few pics below and hopefully alot more tomorrow.

We also wanted to share that whenever Director Liu mentioned to Lei about staying the night with us, Lei would go grab Director Liu's business card. He was obviously making sure he could reach her in case of an emergency. As we have said before, he is extremely smart. Director Liu also said he has been giving her alot of lip service, such as that when he comes to America, he will grow up, be boss of large company, and send orphanage many donations ;-) We are definitely going to have our hands full with this child lol !

Shanghai Site Seeing and more about Paul Lei

Our guide Bruce told us this morning that he spoke to our son on the phone last night because Director Liu called him and let Paul Lei talk too. He said that Paul has been taught to say Mommy, Daddy, and "I love you" in English. He also said that Paul's Mandarin is very good. We are just so excited that we finally get to meet Paul tomorrow afternoon. I am posting some pictures of our siteseeing in Shanghai. The pictures include the Yiwu Gardens, Oriental Pearl Radio & TV Tower, Pudong Airport, Shanghai museum, The Bund, and a local restaurant. We will post more as soon as we meet as our son.

News about our upcoming meeting with Paul Lei

We are in Shanghai now with Bruce Yu siteseeing today. We will leave Friday morning for Taizhou and we have found out that our son Lei is actually living at Director Liu's home until we arrive. We are not sure how long she has had him at her house, but obviously We are suprised and very happy to hear this. Bruce says she wants to teach him some things before we receive him. Bruce also says that Director Liu says Lei is very happy about his adoption so it will be interesting to see if his happiness lasts once he realizes the magnitude of everything happening to him. We are actually taking a bus to Taizhou from Shanghai and Director Liu and Lei are meeting us at the bus station. I can truly say this is not how we ever envisioned our first meeting with our son, but We are loving every minute of it.



Michelle

Shanghai , We're Here !

We arrived in Shanghai about an hour late, but made good time. Our guide Bruce met us and we checked into our hotel, about an hours drive from Pudong Airport. We went to a local restaurant, visited and ate with Bruce. The food was excellent, but we aren't completely sure what we ate ;-) The important thing is that it's after midnight here and no tummy troubles ! We will sitesee in Shanghai with Bruce tomorrow for the whole day and then Friday morning we will take a bus to Taizhou (where Lei's orphanage is). Bruce has informed us that Lei has been staying at Director Liu's home and that Director Liu and Lei will meet us at the bus station in Taizhou when we arrive. This is going to be one interesting Gotcha day I'm here to tell you :-). To our family, we want to let you know that we did receive our panda phone and we will be calling home soon !

I will try to post some pics of our site seeing adventures tomorrow.

New Pictures of Paul from May !

We just received about 40 new pictures of Paul today from a very thoughtful family who just visited the orphanage because their son was adopted from there. I made a smilebox slideshow which I posted at the top of the blog. These recent pictures of Paul are amazing and we are so thankful to have them !

Getting Ready to Travel !

Well this post is long past due, but I'm wore out and we haven't even left lol ;-) So here's the scoop. Our consulate appointment is June 30th but we are leaving on June 17 from KY where both our families live. Please see our itinerary below.

June 17 - Fly to Shanghai
June 18 - Arrive in Shanghai and meet our guide Bruce at the airport in the early afternoon - check into hotel and site see
June 19 - Site see in Shanghai
June 20 - Take Bus with our guide Bruce from Shanghai to Taizhou, Zhejiang province where our son's orphanage is. Site See
June 21 - Visit our Son's orphanage and meet him and orphanage director
June 22 - Ride with Orphanage director and our son from Taizhou to Hangzhou (provincial capital of Zhejiang province).
June 23 - Meet our son at civil affairs bureau and formalize adoption
June 24 - finger printing and other paperwork
June 25 - 4 hour bus ride back to Taizhou to receive Paul's passport (we had no choice in this)
June 26 - Site see in Hangzhou West Lake tour
June 27 - rest and then fly to Guangzhou
June 28 - medical and take visa photo
June 29 - Visit Safari Park
June 30 - Visa appt.
July 1 - Take visa in afternoon
July 2 - Fly out of Guangzhou and head home !